Allah help us all… coz we in trouble times ya’ll…….. we really are
Ever wondered what would happen if someone sneezed, coughed, burped and farted all at the same time? Surely a sight to see. Maybe not for the squeamish.
Is it true that true things are funny? Or rather… funny things are true. Why is it that when people say…
‘its funny when... (put here whatever it is that’s funnily true)’…
its not even the slightest bit humorous?
For e.g.… its funny that Brunei was once a British colony… but they end up supporting England during World Cup.
Yes.. it IS funny. Can I get a double ha?
Anyway..back to the main event. Hadrah rolls please…..
Bruneians are innately brought up with an ingrained teaching that the ability of
mastering the English language is really a gift to be unconditionally proud upon. Don’t need to be nor know nothing else… just conquer the English language… you’re ready to go out and be somebody.
We have been so accustomly blind to respect the so called greatest language… the worldwide tongue, that it has to be some lunatic for a guy to be questioning its brilliancy.
Well im questioning it! In your face, English!
They say (whoever they are)… English is a cool lingo. Its cool to speak English. If you’re homeless and u speak fluent eloquent English…. You’re definitely NOT cool.
Try eating those English words… see if that fills your belly.
English teachers keeps pointing out the 10 most common errors that Malay people make…. The 7 most grammatical mistakes… the 5 most popular faults in a composition.
Im sick…. and tired…… and sick….. and tired… and… Did I say sick?
SICK!!
Sick and tired of English people patronizing and belittling us of how we’re supposedly and intentionally vandalizing they’re precious and holy language.
So… allow me… to present to u… the 10 most common mistakes English people make when speaking malay/ brunei (ada kah tu?... ada2 kan saja tia)
1.What he wants to say: Good day sir.. whats your name? how old are you by the way?
What he ended up saying: Bagus hari tuan… siapa nama kita? macamana tua mu siring jalan?
2. What he wants to say: Ok son! Go out there on the field… keep your chin up, play your football… break a leg son.. don’t sweat it… you’ll definitely win.
What he ended up saying: Baik nak! Aga ko keluar padang atu… naikkan dagu mu, main bula mu… patahkan kaki.. jantah bepaluh… manang ko tu.
3. What he wants to say: Jesus Christ! What the hell are you doing in my room?
What he ended up saying: isa! Neraka apa ko buat dalam bilik ku anie?
4. What he wants to say : I went to KFC last night, and they were right! Finger lickin good!
What he ended up saying: aku ke KFC di malam, Lurus nya derang atu! isap jari nyaman!
5. What he wants to say: Examination will be a piece of cake if you just lend your ear to the
teacher when he’s talking.
What he ended up saying : periksa atu jadi sekarat kek saja kalau ko pinjam kan telinga mu arah cigu kalau ia becakap.
6. What he wants to say: she is truly the apple of my eye.
What he ended up saying: banartah kedia atu epal mata ku.
7. What he wants to say: ya’ll know him to be the best singer there is… sold out concerts everywhere… everytime he touches the mic.. the fans are definitely blown away worldwide.. put your hands up… for Babyface!
What he ended up saying: semua sudah tahu kedia anie penyanyi terbaik…. kena jual keluar konsert di mana-mana…. Setiap kali ia migang mikrofon… tiup nya keluar peminat satu dunia.. angkat tia tangan atu.. untuk muka bayi!
8. What he wants to say: make some noiiiiiiise!!!
What he ended up saying: buat bunyi-bunyiaaaaaaannnnnn!!!
9.What he wants to say: I don’t know.. just out of the blue he invited me to watch the Barbershop 2.
What he ended up saying : nda ku tau.. keluar dari biru.. bawa nya tia ku meliat kadai gunting kedua.
10.What he wants to say: Good night.. sleep tight… sweet dreams and peace out!
What he ended up saying: Malam bagus… tidur katat… manis mimpi…. sejahtera keluar!
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